Child

Child jokes

Soup

    • Boy: Mom, why are you drinking this disgusting red soup? I wanted salad.

    Mom: Quiet, son. We only get this once a month.

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    • Basement

    • What is the difference between a preschool and my basement?

    Little kids leave preschool.

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    • Child memes

    Piranha

    • Today, I learned that a group of piranhas can maul a small child down to the bone in under 20 seconds. Well, I lost my job at the aquarium today.

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    • Baby

    • How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?

    You nail its other hand to the ground.

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    • Trade

    • I saw a sign that said “Watch for children” and I thought, “That sounds like a fair trade.”

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    • Bus Driver

    • So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.

    "If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"

    "If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"

    And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:

    "Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"

    Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"

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    • Orphanage

    • I saw this little girl crying. I asked her where her parents were. She cried more, man, I love working at an orphanage.

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    • Little Johnny

    • Little Johnny was playing with his train and said, "All you motherf*ckers who want to get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who want to get on, get on." His mother hears him and asks, "Is that you cussing?" The mother said, "Go to your room for 1 hour." Little Johnny goes to his room, then comes back one hour later and said, "All you motherf*ckers who wanna get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who wanna get on, get on, and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay, go ask the b*tch in the kitchen."

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