Child jokes
Dark humor is like cancer, it's funnier when children get it.
Imagine getting a call and it says, "Welcome to David's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may we help you?"
How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.
What type of work can orphans do? Homework.
What is an orphan's favorite song? "Lost Boy."
What is an orphan's favorite game?
Happy Family.
A child molester and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a drink.
Mom: Let's have an adoption party!
Kid: *cries*
Mom: What's wrong?
Kid: I'M ADOPTED????
Boy: "Hey mom, can we have ice cream?"
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
What do you call an orphan's family region?
Me time.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they didn’t have a home.
Q: Can orphans watch family-friendly movies?
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They can't find home.
What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?
Children scream when they melt.
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.
He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
What is the difference between apples and orphans?
The apples get picked.