Celebrity jokes
Why is LeBron James an orphan?
Because he doesn't Fortnite.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I care when my computer crashes.
Why is LeBron James an orphan?
Because he doesn't use WhatsApp.
Michael J. Fox walks into an ice cream parlor.
The man behind the counter asks Michael, "Can I help you?"
Michael exclaims, "I would like an ice cream."
The man behind the counter asks, "What flavor?"
Michael says, "It doesn't matter what flavor, I'm gonna fucken drop it anyway."
Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?
'Cause they're the ones making the toys.
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
What time is bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁
What did The Rock say to his dad?
"I'm gonna Rock Bottom my cock down your throat!"
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
Where did Kobe go after the helicopter crashed? Everywhere.
What is the sweat between Dolly Parton's boobs?
Mountain Dew.
Yo mama so ugly, she made the band One Direction go the other direction!
Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.
For Charlie D'Amelio fans, my basement is your home now. Leave a like if you agree with me.
At this point, I don't want a funeral when I commit. I just want a going away party so people have an excuse to celebrate.
What does Justin Bieber and a rabbit have in common?
They're both adorably cute and everyone loves them except for Justin Bieber.
I know this isn't about glue, but here's one:
Cardi B had a sister who was obsessed with fitness. Her name? Cardi O.
Amber Heard Daily Routine:
Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.
Dababy in my dickle trickle when eating my pickle.