Cant jokes
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman.
Why can't orphans go to the store? Because they throw everything around.
Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything.
Why can’t orphans be a space ship? Because they don’t have a mothership!
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't hit a home run.
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.
What do you call a nazi that can’t see?
A nozi.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot.
Now I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't get a home run.
Why can't orphans go to movies?
There PG-13 movies.
Why can't orphans watch PG movies? Parental guidance.
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas, I can't wait to see how it turns out.
A woman wakes up in a hospital after an accident and yells, "Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
And the doctor says, "I know, I amputated your arms."
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
Do you know why there are no pharmacies and pharmacists in Africa?
Because you can't take pills on an empty stomach!
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Oh, wait, he doesn’t walk.
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
Because they have no one to call “daddy.”
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because it can never find home.