Canning jokes
Your forehead is so big you can land a jumbo jet on it.
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
Why can you hit orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
People have been telling me that you can get things for free now.
The other day I saw a sign saying "FREE PALESTINE."
Memes
Can a person in a wheelchair stand up for themselves?
Why can the orphan only buy 1 ice cream cone?
He can't afford a family pack.
A few men have curved penises, but they can fix that problem by straightening it out.
A pecan is motivated because pe-can do anything.
I am in trouble. My mum asked me to get six cans of Sprite.
But I got seven Up.
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
B: Can you please stop roasting me?
A: At least the "roasting" that I did to you didn't burn you to death.
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
Why are orphans lucky?
Because they can get in trouble and nobody can tell their parents.
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
Why aren't blind people in Brazil?
Because they can only read Braille. 🇧🇷 🙄
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A. A bird can fly, but a fly cannot bird.