Cancer jokes
What's black and eats Kitty?
Serval cancer.
Some people put zodiacs on everything.
They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.
What is a type of cancer that:
Affects you. Is caused by a device. Is annoying. People won't stop talking about it?
Easy, the answer is Fortnite.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.
What did the cancer cell say to its neighbor?
"Mind if I join you?"
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park.
Lord: "Has something happened while I was gone?"
Gardener: "Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burying your dog."
Lord: "My dog died?!"
Gardener: "Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down."
Lord: "My mansion?! How?!"
Gardener: "Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains."
Lord: "Why was she so distraught?"
Gardener: "She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped."
Lord: "My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?!"
Gardener: "Oh right! Your cancer test results!"
What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer? Cell-ablate!
Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.
You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant.
After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!”
She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
All zodiac signs have a hair style, but cancer is just a one-way thing.
A player in Baldi's Basics says, "Why are you bald?"
Baldi responds, "Well, I have cancer."
The player says, "Oh, good for you!"
I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. My friend's already on stage 4.
You have to have real balls to face prostate cancer.
Just not for long!
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb, 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."
Nurse: *Laughs*
Kid: "Why are you laughing?"
Nurse: "When I get OLDER."
Proceeds to laugh.
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
What do you call a person whose Lymphoma keeps recurring?
A Lymphomaniac.