Can jokes

I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.

I can always tell if someone is lying just by looking at them.

I can also tell if they are standing.

People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.

Can you go as a horse for Halloween?

Well, if you do, I can't wait to ride you!

9/11 isn't something we should joke about. Some people can remember where they were when they found out. I'll never forget where I was when I found out.

It was 9:37, September 10th, 2001. I was in a cave in Iraq when my friend Mohammad told me.

How can you tell if a man is straight? You don't have to, he will tell you.

What's the worst thing you can say to a widow?

"I'm sorry, I just had to."

*P.O.V orphan wanting to go on school trip/camp*

Teacher: “Can I have your parent's signature? It isn’t filled out.”

Orphan: “Um yeah.... That’s gonna be hard....”

Teacher: “Why?”

Orphan: “I just have to find them first....”

If a furry looks like an animal, sounds like animal, and acts like an animal, can I run over it with my car like an animal?

Pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they can't cry to their parents!

BF: Babe, I have two questions.

GF: Ok, ask!

BF: Where have you been all my life?

GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?

BF: Can you please go back there?

Hey! This site has a home page, but I wonder if the orphans can see it.

What can a gay man not be, but a heterosexual female that is a whore can be if a heterosexual male gives her enough money? 💸

cock teaser

What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?

Tic-tac-toe.

What do emo boys and emo girls have in common? They both wanna die and cut so they can die faster, but they are already dead, already dead to me!

A kid had school today.

He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)

Why are Democrats represented by the donkey? Because some Democrats can be such an ass!

Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.

I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"

I had sex with a disabled girl. You can say I handiclapped those cheeks.