Call jokes
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.
Patient: “Doctor, my bottom hurts.”
Doctor: “Can you tell me exactly where it hurts?”
Patient: “Right around the entrance.”
Doctor: “As long as you call it the entrance, it will hurt.”
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
My girlfriend asked me if we could have anal sex, and I said, "What's that?" She said, "I fuck her ass." I said, "Oh, my uncle calls that shhhhh."
I started a band called 999 megabytes... we still haven't gotten a gig.
Memes
That one stupid kid in class :
What do you call an epileptic kid eating fruits?
A blender.
What do you call a nut on a wheelchair?....A busted nut.
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.
Q. What do you call a Mexican Jedi?
A. a PadaJuan.
I pushed a disabled kid in a fire, then called him "hot wheels."
What do you call an orphan taking a picture with it's family?
A self-fie.
One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."
What do you call a Communist sniper? -- A Marxman.
You want to hear a dirty joke?
This guy and this girl were having sex when the guy's boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick." His boss replies, "You don't sound sick." The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone.
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican?
A Mexican't.
What do you call an expert fisherman?
A "MASTER-BAITER".
What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?
A bath bomb.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
Friends call me crack miser, whatever I snort. My brain starts to distort! I'll be in court.