What do you call a swimming terrorist?
A bath bomb.
What do you call a retard with a boner? A slowpoke.
What do you call a prostitute with a major in math?
The thot that counts.
what do you call a retard smoking weed?
a baked potato.
What do you call someone with a pindie spot?
Stop screen recording.
What do you call a nut on a wheelchair?....A busted nut.
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.
I started a band called 999 megabytes... we still haven't gotten a gig.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
My asian neighbors dinner.
Johnny Depp fans claim to support their god because they sympathize with male victims of sexual assault. Yet a large chunk of them cheer on Wacko Jacko raping little boys, calling it "innocent".
What do you call two transgender midgets having sex?
A microtransaction.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.
Q. What do you call a Mexican Jedi?
A. a PadaJuan.
I pushed a disabled kid in a fire, then called him "hot wheels."
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
What do you call a Communist sniper? -- A Marxman.
You want to hear a dirty joke?
This guy and this girl were having sex when the guy's boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick." His boss replies, "You don't sound sick." The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone.
One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican?
A Mexican't.
What do you call an expert fisherman?
A "MASTER-BAITER".
