Call jokes
Mom: Wake up!
Me: No, I'm too disappointed and I have a headache...
Mom: Why are you disappointed?
Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up...
My friend tried to sleep on napkins.
I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.
What do you call a dino stripper?
A dinohore.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Q: What do you call a blonde with only two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
What do you call a mammal that has no hair?
Cancer.
What do you call a sad, depressed artist? Anything but "Cows of Woe".
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"
Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?
'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.
What do you call a Krispy Kreme Donut combined with a Big Mac from McDonalds?
A Krispy Kreme Mac.
How do you finger a feminist? Shake her hand and call her Theresa.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?
Russell
What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much?
Nose-less.
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
Q: What do you call a rich Asian? A: Dr.
What do you call a bunch of sheep rolling down the hill?
A. A lamb slide.
While an unsuspecting father's at the office making money, this 18 year old son will spend his day in mother's cunny.
We're at the breakfast table, father eats and takes his calls, he doesn't know my mother's toes are kneading at my balls.