What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll-up.
Buy Jokes
🇻🇪 Finally, I am a trillionaire. Now I can buy bread.
People shouldn't worry about how orphans would feel reading these jokes. It's not like they have parents to buy them a phone or computer to see them, or even a place to charge them even if they did have one.
What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?
Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
Why can't orphans buy chips?
Because they're family sized!
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
To buy a house.
The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.
Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.
The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.
I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"
"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?"
I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."
Two simple steps to get 15,000 people to follow you:
Step 1: Buy a bottle of water (doesn't matter the size).
Step 2: Run through Africa with that bottle of water.
Perfect! Now you got yourself half the population there following you!
Why do orphans not buy a keyboard? Because they can’t use the home button.
Why did the priest buy a clown suit?
Because the old one had blood all over it.
I offered to share a meal with a homeless person once, but he said, "Piss off and buy your own!"
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
What is missing when an orphan buys a laptop?
The home screen.
I was shopping for a halloween costume, but once we got to the ghost section all of the costumes were out of stock! It turned out Pristiano Penaldo was buying them all! I came up to him and asked why he was doing this and he said: I’m sorry, but it’s match day, I must be a ghost 👻👻
Pokemon Jokes!
What do you do when your Loudred evolves?
Buy more earplugs!
Why couldn't the orphan buy chips?
They were all family sized.
The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.
Why buy a pregnant slave over a normal slave? Buy 1 get 1 free. 😂😂😂😂
Why can't homeless people buy a house?
'Cause they live on the streets.
