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I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have?

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  • Why is the lesbian lifestyle so expensive? -- They're always eating out.

    ... and they buy Rolexes for their neighbors, because they wanna watch.

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  • A programmer and his wife.

    She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."

    After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.

    The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"

    He replies, "They had eggs."

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