Butt jokes
Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?
A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩
If you are American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
Euro-peein'.
Mommy kisses my butt.
I like my women how I like my cigarettes: Smokin’ hot, and with a little saliva on the butt.
Someone butt-dialed me again yesterday. It seems that only assholes want to talk to me.
Your butt is bigger than Uranus!
I went for my routine check up last week, and everything was going great until the doctor stuck her finger up my butt. Should I look for a new dentist?
Your butt's so big you can slap it and ride the waves.
So, a bear and a rabbit are in a field. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Does your poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit replied, "No." Then the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
There was a woman sitting with me.
I had to leave until she pointed at something—it was my butt.
I was confused until it was her turn for truth or dare.
What's big and round?
Mine and not yours.
Yo mama is so stupid, she shoved two double A batteries up her butt and said, “I’ve got the power!”
What do you call a guy whose hand is up a horse's butt?
An Amish Mechanic.
You're so skinny you use floss to wipe your butt.
This page could use more "butt quack" jokes.
Why do duckies wipe after they poop?
Their butt quack.
Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."
And the other friend says, "Butt he is."
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.
What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
What did the cowboy say to the girl on the beach?
"Sandy cheeks."