But jokes

My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone, but I passed him a calculator. He couldn't tell the difference.

I would create an orphan website, but you need a homepage to do that.

You're really special.

But the R in special is silent.

Back in ancient Greece, there was a Greek Skyrim, but instead of FUS ROH DAH, the main character said, "Me damnit, Ganymede, get the #10 lightning bolt, I hate it when Helios lets his kids drive!"

If you don't get this, look up the story of Phaethon, and if you STILL don't get it, then you are dumb.

When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.

I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.

I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.

In a world of feline folly, There lived a cat with a secret, A taste for adventure and mischief, And a love for KFC's golden treat.

With eyes like emerald jewels, And fur as black as night, This feline prowled the streets, In search of a savory delight.

Oh, how it yearned for chicken, Crispy and finger-lickin' good, But the cat knew it had to be sly, To satisfy its craving like it should.

Through alleyways it stealthily tiptoed, With nimble paws and a stealthy glide, Until it stumbled upon a secret, That made its hunger amplified.

A stash of KFC's golden eggs, Hidden away from prying eyes, An accidental treasure trove, A feast fit for a feline paradise.

With each stolen egg devoured, The cat's satisfaction grew, The taste of crispy breading, And juicy chicken, it knew.

Word soon spread of this food bandit, A legend of a cat so bold, Whispers echoed through the town, Of the one who stole the KFC gold.

But the cat with the KFC get eggs, Remained a mystery to all, A phantom of the night it became, Leaving no trace, no trail to recall.

And so, it continues its nightly quest, For chicken that satisfies its soul, The cat with the KFC get eggs, Forever on the prowl, never to be controlled.

I can't handle these puns...

But I can HAND you some puns!

Budum tiss!

The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! 😮 You could say they dialed that correctly.

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.

But why is 10 scared? Because he is in the middle of 9/11.

If the sun is in space, then why is there light on Earth, but not in space?

Why were the Twin Towers mad?

Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza but it came plain.

Yo mama so fat, she fell over. Nobody laughed, but the ground cracked up.

Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?

It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.

Why were the Twin Towers angry?

Because they ordered pepperoni, but they got plane.

One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.

Roses are red, violets are blue, The children are fast, But Elmo is faster, Bow down to your master!

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A family portrait........

You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?

Wait..........

If you want to see what I look like, then pics will be coming soon!

But freshfry, how are you!

Oh, and this is Cassie, aka princess shortie!

My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.