Business jokes
Why did the Twin Towers report to the pizza restaurant?
Because they asked for pepperoni, but they got plain.
Your mom is so hot, if she had an OnlyFans page, she would get more money than companies during Pride Month.
Who makes more money, a drug dealer or a prostitute?
A prostitute, because she can always wash her crack and sell it again.
What do you call a person that guards a Samsung store?
A Guardian Of The Galaxy :)
"MERCURY INSURANCE, come to our office in Mercury."
What do you call a guy with a big dick that likes to eat fish?
Long John Silvers or Captain D's.
What’s the difference between 1000 used tires and 1000 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because they wanted to bake some BEATS.
Why did the rapper become a banker?
Because he wanted to make some BIG BANK DEPOSITS!
Why was the rapper so good at math?
Because he could count bars like NOBODY’S BUSINESS!
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because he wanted to ROLL in the DOUGH!
I am starting a business where I help people count. It is called making the little things count.
Q. What did the United Healthcare CEO say after he got shot? A. I don't know. I don't own a Ouija board.
When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
"A satisfactory."
Do they call it rapeseed oil because it is lube?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ya.
Ya who?
Yahooooo!!!
Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."
What's the best thing about a prostitute dying on you during sex?
The second hour is free.
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.