Building jokes
What did one brick say to the other? Never LEGO.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 67 stories in 0.67 milliseconds.
Life as an elevator has its ups and downs.
What's the difference between twin towers and McDonald's?
One had a drive thru and the other had a fly thru.
Friend 1: I don't want to jump.
Friend 2: Me neither.
Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.
Friend 1: *jumps*
Friend 2: *jumps*
Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!
Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.
Why do people want to jump off buildings?
Because they want to become Superman.
I was visiting an orphanage and started to pull in close to the building. My car hit 3 speed bumps, and it caught me off guard. I got out of my car, looked under my tire, and saw three orphans wedged in my tire. I started to get worried, but then I thought to myself... nobody will miss them.
Bin Laden’s kid comes sad from school.
“Dad, I got an F in Geography class!”
“Why is that?”
“The teacher asked me what’s the tallest building in New York and I said ‘Empire State Building.’”
Bin Laden waits a moment and then replies, “Let dad handle this one.”
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
I was walking down the hallway at my job when I saw a kid crying.
I asked him where his parents were, and he kept crying.
Man, I love working at the orphanage.
What falls down the building and doesn't get up again?
An emo.
The Twin Towers are like my dad, they are never coming back.
Why were the people on the World Trade Center so pissed?
People, they ordered pepperoni pizza, but they got plane.
It's horrible to make jokes about 9/11, but it's not funny when I found out my mate's mum jumped from the 21st floor.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, then they got plane.
What did the pedestrian say after he saw the twin towers fell?
JENGA!!!!
Don't treat her like a gold pump when she's treating you like a gray pistol. Put down a launch pad and rotate.
The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!