Bread jokes
What do strippers and butter have in common?
Both spread for bread.
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
Suck all the bread!
How do people eat bread?
Why doesn't bread like warm weather?
It gets toasty!
What's the difference between a baby and garlic bread? I feel bad when I drop garlic bread.
What do you call a stuck Panera Bread?
Panera Wedged.
A programmer and his wife.
She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."
After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.
The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"
He replies, "They had eggs."
Every time I come in the kitchen, my girl is in the kitchen in the damn refrigerator eating all the food, like the fried chicken, the mashed potatoes, the collard greens, mac and cheese, and the cornbread.
Then I said I wanna eat some of that shit. I love soul food. Then I told her, "You keep it up; your fat ass is going to be big like the house on Haunted Hill."
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
An Indian kid walked into the shop and had a curry down because they had no naan bread in stock.
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because he wanted to make dough.
what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?
Panera dead.
I was running away from expired grocery items with my friend, when I got out I noticed he was left for bread. I felt so guilty, he was toast. I'm not loafing this.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
Bread?
Why is flour retarded?
Because it's in-bread.
What flour do you give an orphan?
Self-raising.