Brain jokes

1+1 answer 2 said all the kids, but 1 kid said 5. Then I said your mom feels embarrassed because everyday you look into the mirror, you see how empty your brain is.

Roll your eyes back, you might find a brain back there.

What has more brains than the Columbine students? The wall behind them, xD.

I have OCD and ADD, so everything had to be perfect...but not for long.

If I had a dollar for every brain cell LEO has, I’d have one dollar.

Why are you rolling your eyes? Are you looking for your brain?

I get so many things stuck in my head, though, unfortunately none of them were a bullet.

I had an Alzheimer's joke, but something's fogging up my mind.

What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.

How do our brains remember that we forgot something, but we can't remember what that thing was?

You should never suppress a fart. It travels up the spine high into the brain. That's where the shit ideas come from.

In light of Trump's slurring, staggering, and incoherence, I wondered if he should get checked for a brain tumor.

Then I realized how ridiculous that sounded.

A tumor can't grow in something that doesn't exist in the first place.

You have two brain cells; one is lost, and the other is out looking for it.

What do you call an Autistic kid?

A work of Daniel.

You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.

They call me Mr. Distracted, truly a spastic. Can't talk to my folks cause they say I'm pro- problematic. Really fantastic. Can't focus unless I take meds then it's magic. My brain is like traffic, always fucking active. But never at the right time, pretty fucking tragic it happens.

How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?

Two, one for her and one for the baby.

What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla? One of them is fat and hairy, while the other one has a functional brain (the gorilla, of course).

I wasn't going to have a brain transplant...

But then I changed my mind.

I finally know why my brain doesn't work!

On the left side, there's nothing right, and on the right side, there's nothing left.