Body jokes

Yo mama so FAT... I tried to picture her in my head... AND SHE BROKE MY GOD DAMN NECK!

I would tell you a joke about my dink, but it's too long.

How can you tell if your sister is on her period?

Your father's dick tastes funny.

You have gaps in your teeth, looks like your tongue is in jail.

What is the definition of a woman?

A life support system for a vagina.

I went to the doctor's yesterday. I said, "When I touch my back, it hurts. When I touch my knee, it hurts. When I touch anything, it hurts!" 😣 What’s wrong with me?

Doctor: You’ve broken your finger.

What has fingernails and legs made of grass? You, I lied about the grass.

Why do people keep saying, "Why did the toilet paper not cross?" Because it got stuck in the crack, because it got stuck in their crack.

A little girl said one day, "Grandma's gonna die tonight!" The next morning, the girl's grandmother's body was found.

That day she said again, "Grandpa's gonna die tonight!" Sure enough, the girl's grandfather died and his body was discovered the next morning.

That day she said, "Daddy's gonna die tonight." The girl's father was terrified. He lay shaking the entire night. Somehow, he survived until morning. His wife came into the room crying. He asked her why she was upset and she said that the postman had died last night.

Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he had no BODY to go with...

I could have said a skeleTON more jokes, but I think that might break your funny bone.

What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.

A man walks over to a little boy and asks, "Wanna see my tattoo of a bunny?"

The little boy replies with, "Yes please, I love bunnies!"

The man proceeds to pull his pants down and said, "Can you see it yet?"

The little boy curious says, "No, where is it?"

The man says, "Dig a little deeper, he runs into the hole when he gets scared!"

Me and my friends were having a party the other day when some bitch came bitching about the noise. Thankfully, she was hot and had a nice ass, so it was enjoyable raping her.

The next day when I woke up, I found her body only half eaten. Her lower body was still intact, so I went for seconds to fuck off the hangover. Then I had breakfast. Her ass tasted good with some ketchup.

Did you hear about the guy whose left side got cut off!

But he’s all right now.

Balls.

Yo mama so fat, Dora can't explore her.

Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.

How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a lil' boogie in it ;)

Q: What do you say to a kid who threatens to beat you up?

A: We can always rearrange your liver 😏

They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.