What did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast? His left shoulder.
Body Jokes
You ever had sex with a woman that is so fat, it counted as a threesome?
Maybe your butt good? Maybe bad... I'M GOING TO LAUGH!
Nie cut G.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
What do you call a dead woman in the back of your car?
Idk, I just have a couple in the backseat.
What's big and black?
My balls.
Your mum is so fat that when she looks in the mirror, the mirror cracked!
Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"
A boy tried to give a tree a high-five, but instead, he ended up hanging.
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock, she's probably just pulling your leg.
Boobies!
Vagina?
My dick harder than stone, man.
My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.
Dammit, I hanged off their nose off.
What’s under the bottom?
Your legs.
"Simon says touch your chin."
The fat people be like, "Which one?"
Yo momma's so fat, she rolled out the bed, out the room, down the stairs, smashed through the window, rolled down the road, and got stuck in the Grand Canyon.
What did the skeleton pull out from behind his ear?
Nothing. Skeletons don’t have ears.
