Body jokes
Your mom uses the equator as a belt.
What was the drug addict's favorite nursery rhyme?
I'm a little crack pot short and stout, put that crack pipe in my mouth, sell my body or sell my couch, get that lighter and smoke me out!
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
Do you know Wildee?
What's that?
Will deez nuts fit into your mouth?
What did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast? His left shoulder.
You ever had sex with a woman that is so fat, it counted as a threesome?
Maybe your butt good? Maybe bad... I'M GOING TO LAUGH!
Nie cut G.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
What do you call a dead woman in the back of your car?
Idk, I just have a couple in the backseat.
What's big and black?
My balls.
Your mum is so fat that when she looks in the mirror, the mirror cracked!
Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"
A boy tried to give a tree a high-five, but instead, he ended up hanging.
If your blind girlfriend says you have a big cock, she's probably just pulling your leg.
Boobies!
Vagina?
My dick harder than stone, man.
My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.
Dammit, I hanged off their nose off.