I'm gonna open up a bar for emos. I think I'll call it the The Cutting Board.
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing chess.
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board
“No I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken”.
Q: What is germany's favorite board game? A: nahtzee (yahtzee)
I might slide up to your block with intelligence I'm a genius with a glock There's some relevance Took his chain, took his rocks Took his sediments There's no cap inside my speech No impediments Putting numbers on the board, I use my calculator Put a opp below the floor, he's a denominator E = mc2, you didn't notice that? Had the shot, but he's too scared Why didn't he buss it back?
Why are orphans bad at Yahtzee? They don't know what a house is.
My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all and If i could borrow it.
i was in cooking class and my teacher said - does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?
me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
long story short the teacher understood the joke and now we are both in daily therapy 😭💀
A reincarnated and heavily modified T-Rex is something that's been on my drawing board for years
Why are americans bad chess players?
They lost 2 towers
Where do surfers go to school?
Boarding School
What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.
what is the difference between a emo kid and a cutting board
I donated a computer to the orphanage... It didn’t have a mother board.
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
Why isn’t the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
How many emos like anagrams?
Some.
What do you call those who remain My Chemical Romance fans?
Emold.
What is the connection between Emos and Darth Vader?
They both dress in all black and none of them has a father.
What do you call flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Who cares, let them cry in the dark.
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
Anthony went into the bakery and ordered Emo Cake.
“Emo cake?” says the baker. ” What exactly is it?”
Anthony says, “It’s the cake that cuts itself.”
How do you pull an emo from a tree?
Cut the rope.
What’s the similarity between emos and unsalted popcorn?
They’re both white and flavourless.
What do emo birds call their mouths?
Bleaks.
What do you call an obese emo teen?
An edgelard.
Recommended: Fat Jokes
What do you call a gang of emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
How are cats and emos different from one another?
The cat still has 8 other lives.
Why does emo get tattoos of fruits on their arms?
They are playing Fruit Ninja.
What will you call Sonic if he’s an emo?
Sonic the Edgy hog.
Why would the emo swallow a clock?
So he could wake up inside.
Why are Emos still around?
Because the suffering never ends.
What is the best way to get an emo off your balcony?
You encourage them.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
What is the favourite game of an emo?
Hangman.
Why do people wish their lawn grass was emo?
So it could cut itself.
A group of friends started an emo salsa band.
They call themselves HisPanic at the Disco.
What is the difference between pizza and emo pizza?
Emo pizza kind of cuts itself.
This chess game against America and England is getting interesting, first America lost both of its towers but now England has lost its queen
I guess in British chess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without two towers
“what’s that on your wrist?” “im a cutting board. duh”
Did you hear the passengers on the titanic invited yo! Momma and the titanic crew said man over board
