Bigness jokes
What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?
My donation to the orphanage :)
Why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant? Because he had a big bill.
Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!
Edna: Hey there big boy!
Big boy: You need to stop doing this.
Your forehead is so big, I thought you were Megamind for a second there.
Mother: We need to talk about sex...
Jason: Oh, sex, tell me what do you wanna know.
Jason had a big whooping from his mother and big spanking from his dad.
Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."
This guy went to the gas station to get some gas, and as he asked the cashier for gas he noticed a terrible smell. He asked what the smell was and the cashier replied, "That's your gas, cuz I farted. Now hand me the 20 bucks!"
The guy said, "No, not the kind that comes from your ass, but the kind you put in a car!" The cashier says, "That fart was worth 20 bucks, so beat it!"
Guy says, "I need real gas, nothing about your ass impresses me!" Then another guy gets in line and says, "I know the guy personally, we grew up together. Always trying to be the cool kid in school, bragging about his big horse's ass...no wonder he was always the *butt* of all jokes!"
What's big and white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Your forehead is so big you can headbutt my face and chest at the same time.
Sharb Glarv Jug jug Milky Jar jar Pobbies Mm yum yum Rawr Big pooboes.
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, flags big plus.
Bully... you're such an asshole. Me... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger.
Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.
Yo mama was so big, she was the iceberg that sunk the Titanic.
I'm so poor I have to put my Big Mac burger on layaway.
Knob Klondike, I want Ellen. Poobiess, please. I want big juicy pobs in me right now. Ellen girl, give milk boob to me with good Pochyy, babie.
Yo, hairline goes farther back than the Big Bang theory!
Why were ET's eyes so big?
Because he saw the phone bill.
Q: How do you know there’s a party at Neverland Ranch? A: All the Big Wheels are parked out front.
Q: When do you know it’s over? A: Only one is left.