New Bigness Jokes

Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.

My girlfriend called me pedophile today.

Big word for a 12-year-old.

This is how big cats were named.

"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."

"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

I don’t know, flags big plus.

How did Teddy Roosevelt swing all the ladies?

He spoke softly and carried a big stick.

On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.

Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a big forehead, and your hairline recedes too.

Just 'cause I have a big penis doesn't mean I can't have sex.

Why is it that a physically disabled gay white male will refuse to ask his boss that is an abled bodied gay white male for an increase in his paycheck?

Since he has a very big white dick in his mouth, that could be the reason why.

Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.

What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus.

Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"

So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."

He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

Your hairline is so big, I couldn't find the area of it on Jupiter.

Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.

What’s a rapper’s favorite type of fishing?

Catching BIG BASS.

Why did the rapper become a banker?

Because he wanted to make some BIG BANK DEPOSITS!

I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.