Beverage jokes
If she’s old enough to smoke, She’s old enough to choke.
If she’s old enough to pee, She’s old enough for me.
I have tried coke; it is not my cup of tea.
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!
People are like tequila glasses,
you gotta shoot them down fast.
What's the king of all school supplies? A ruler.
What's a flower's favorite drink at the movie theater? Root Beer.
What's a cow's favorite place to go during his free time? The Moooovies.
Memes
Why did Marxism never catch on in England?
Because then it would be impossible to get proper tea.
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.
"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"
How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
How do rappers like their coffee? With a lot of flow creamer.
How do you trick a camel jockey into drinking a bottle of watermelon schnapps?
Pour watermelon seeds into a bottle of watermelon schnapps.
What’s an orphan’s favorite drink?
Foster’s.
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.
We gave Erik ten Hag 7-Up after Liverpool thrashed Man Utd 7-0. He said, "F**k you all!"
Anybody who doesn't like Pepsi is a Coke-sucker!
I will never forget my grandpa's last words:
"What the fuck is in this drink?"
What do you call a priest that likes juice?
A Capriest Sun.
Iron jug.
What do you call a person that is both Black and Hispanic and was born on Wednesday? Miérkoolaids.