Beverage jokes
Did you hear about the person who got hit in the head with a soda can?
Good thing it was a "soft" drink!
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
A feminist walks into a bar. Her friend says, "Oh my god, your shoulders are broad!" Another woman says, "Are you sure it's a woman?"
You know where I get my soda? Mini-soda.
Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.
What happened to the gator when he walked into the hospital?
He became Gatorade.
My friend had a drink called Quick Start, so I said, "That's a quick start to the morning!"
I want diabetes so I can drink loads of Coke. - Louie Fennell 2018
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought that fruit punch was a boxer.
A man attacked me with cheese and milk. How dairy!
Hey, look, it's Bai! (insert the picture of a Bai drink)
What do you get when you cross a cow with a coffee bean grower?
De-calf!
A mushroom walked into a pub.
He asked the bartender to give him a beer.
The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."
The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.