Beverage jokes
Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.
What happened to the gator when he walked into the hospital?
He became Gatorade.
My friend had a drink called Quick Start, so I said, "That's a quick start to the morning!"
I want diabetes so I can drink loads of Coke. - Louie Fennell 2018
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought that fruit punch was a boxer.
A man attacked me with cheese and milk. How dairy!
Hey, look, it's Bai! (insert the picture of a Bai drink)
What do you get when you cross a cow with a coffee bean grower?
De-calf!
A mushroom walked into a pub.
He asked the bartender to give him a beer.
The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."
The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"
What's the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea, his eye hurts. The doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink. When he finished, the doctor told him: "From now on, take off the spoon."
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
Someone goes into a bar and asks for a blow job. The barman goes, "Me too." But then the guy goes, "I meant the drink."
I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it is just a FANTAsea.
I go to the shop and buy 2 pints of kimo.