Being jokes

What would Patrick be if he was a dumbass and an autistic person?

A dumbism star.

Cesar: What was that good salad called?

Servant: Ceaser, Cesar.

Cesar: Okay, what's going to be the weather like?

Servant: Hail, Cesar.

Cesar: Yes, I know "Hail Cesar," but I need to know what the weather's like!

Servant: Well, it's hail, Cesar.

Cesar: AHHHHH! Send him to the DUNGEONS! NOW!

If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

Look at me again,

It will be the end of you.

Why can't LGBTQ+ members be straight? Because they are LGBTQ, they are losers.

If BLESSEDBRIAN were any more inbred, he’d be a SANDWICH.

Serial killers be like: "Blood is red, veins are blue, next one is YOU."

Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...

What does my arm have in common with paper?

They both can be cut.

I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.

Two hunters are in the woods and one falls to the ground.

Terrified, he dials 911 and says, “Help! I think my friend is dying. What do I do?” The nurse says, “I need you to make sure he’s dead.” The hunter replies, “Ok, I’ll be right back.” The nurse is startled after hearing a gunshot. The hunter comes back and says, “I checked. Now what do I do?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his heart has completely stopped.” She is startled when she hears the sound of a taser. The hunter comes back and says, “What’s next?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his brain has completely shut down.” The nurse is once again startled when she hears the sound of a bone being crushed by what seemed to be a hammer. The hunter comes back and asks, “Anything else?” The nurse says, “Nope. That’s it.”

Uranus be like, "Oh look, I'm Uranus. Imagine how disgusted I feel."

Your hairline is so far back that it would be a 70 mile trip to the back.

*New teacher walks in* New Teacher: Hi there, class. My name is Mr. Willy. I will be your math teacher.

*Me in shock, "Willy"* Me: Willy Wonka, is that you?

When the priest said, "Be gone from this boy, demon!" the demon replied, "And you get out of the boy!"

What would the Mandalorian be called if it was made in an aquatic center?

Mandachlorian.

You used to be someone’s sunshine, but sorry, the climate changed. 😂😂😂😂

What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?

You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.

There was this Down syndrome boy that always wanted to be a cop, and he did. He pulled someone over and said, "Know why I pulled you over?"

The guy replied, "Because I was speeding?"

He said, "No, because you're black."