Beat

Beat Jokes

"TINY HANDS, EVEN TINIER BRAIN" ==========================

(live comedy club) Foul Mouthed Trump Hating Comic :

......"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump, what the fuck up with that dude, man ? Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas !) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for being fucked up, for instance"....

STUMP : TEENY DICK

BUMP : TINY TIT

GUMP : DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY

MUMP : A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE

LUMP : IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED

UMP : OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS

RUMP : AN ASS

DUMP : A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS

HUMP : SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD

PUMP : SEE "HUMP"

. . . and last, but definitely not least --

JUMP : JUMP INTO A DEEP HOLE MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO TO HELL !!

.... "Well that's about it for me as my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a turn for the worse !! ......(splort!, plop!)....... OOOOPS !! ..... sniff,sniff ........ Ewww !" (audience roars) "Fuhhhhk !... I better go, 'cause I just went !! ..... Ha! ha! ha!"

......"Thank You Lazies and Gerbilmen ! Good Night !!" ............

(endless laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants pee-ing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', guns poppin')

"OH LORDY !!... HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH, AND ARMAGETTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE!!"

(quick curtain call, and off to waiting taxi.........with the windows down) .......Amen. ==============================

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101 pedo jokes whys everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, its called women taking advantage, youl shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who dont admit there like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why dont you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, ive been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, i know whats going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jelous coz your drink tastes like shit?, is it coz your shit though?, how many bids have you done?, shit 1million views, dont try bribe me, did the police give me snip?, hows my barbie doll or shall i say my little pony? the police beat fuck outta me, whats all these needle marks on my arm, i can tell you want something, whys everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web,

keep it going on lol

The IRS came to this man's house one day and told him to come in the next morning to talk about all the money that's been coming in and out of his bank account. So the man thought, "Maybe I need to get a lawyer." So he and his lawyer get to the IRS's office and sit down, and the agent said, "There has been a large amount of money flowing in and out of your account, and we wanted to know if you knew anything about it." The man says, "Yes, I do. I'm a gambler." The agent says, "You gamble with that much money?" The man says, "Yes, I'll give you an example. Alright, I bet you $5,000 that I can bite my left eye." Agent says, "Alright, deal." The man takes out his fake eye and bites it. Then the agent says, "That's not fair." The man says, "I'll let you get your money back, or even more. I bet you $7,500 I can bite my right eye." The agent, thinking, "I didn't see him come in with a guide dog or a stick," so the agent says, "Deal." The man takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye. The agent then says, "That's not fair." The man replies, "Alright, I have another one. You're down $12,500. I'll bet you $15,000, if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room, I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere." The agent says, "That's impossible, you've got a deal." The man starts peeing and pees all over his desk, and the agent says, "I got you!" He's laughing and happy that he finally beat him, but then the lawyer has his hand on his face, and the agent asked, "What's wrong with you?" and the lawyer replies, "The man bet me $100,000 he could piss on your desk, and you'd just love it."

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So apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.

Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.

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