Bathroom jokes
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? "You look a bit flushed."
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
Toothbrush: I think I have the worst job ever.
Toilet paper: Ya, right.
When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...
Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.
POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!
When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
One dark stormy night when I was 8 years old, I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee. Half asleep, I walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door, I felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically, and the ghostly sound stopped. Terrified, I did what I had to and went back to bed.
The next 3 nights, the same thing happened, and finally, I decided I had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up, I went into my parents' room and woke my mom up and said, "You have to come with me and see this, it's really important." Half asleep, she murmured, "Oh, what is it? Can't it wait until the morning?" I pleaded, "No, you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost. When I go in the middle of the night, I can hear a ghost sound. Then when I open the door, I feel the cold as it swoops through me, and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "Oh, so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."
So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
Why did Tigger look in the toilet?
He was looking for "poo."
How do I get out of the toilet seat? Help me, please. I'm very stuck!
If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop! Hahahahhaha!
Yo mama so ugly, she went to the bathroom and scared the sh*t out of the toilet.
You're so dumb that every time you use the bathroom, you use your shoe to wipe your ass.
An orphan uses a family bathroom, and when he comes out, he gets told, "This is a family bathroom."