Bad jokes
Johnny is very attached to his parents. He asks to take a shower with her when she gets in. He looks down and asks, "What's that?" The mother replies, "That's my garage." He looks up and asks, "What are those?" The mother responds, "Those are my headlights."
He then goes and takes a shower with his dad. He looks down, "Daddy, what's that?" The dad replies, "That's my car." He goes to sleep that night and wakes up because of a bad dream. He goes and tells his mother and she says, "You can lay with me." He falls fast asleep then wakes up once more because of falling off the bed. He gets back up and gets under the covers. Then he feels the bed moving. He looks under the covers to investigate and sees them going at it. He then yells, "Mommy, turn on you're headlights, Daddy's parking his car in you're garage!" *THUD*
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.
A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.
BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.
NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
Trump.
Get it because Trump is a joke hahaha, I am sooo bad!
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
My kids [are] so damn bad[.] We took them to Disney in Florida. They paid me not to bring them back ever.
I feel bad for the doc now✌️💀
Why is America bad at chess? We already lost two towers.
Craig Duncan is a child soldier with bad breath and has killed 5 people (on Fortnite).
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.
Aha, tomato macaroni is bad, hahaha.
(I don't even know what on earth I put here, but okay.)
I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Bro, your humor is so bad I bet you would laugh at this.
A B 💿.
Abortion is bad.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.
What’s red and bad for your dental health? A brick.
What’s invisible and bad for you to breathe? Mustard gas.
What’s green and bad for you to drink? Radioactive waste.
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital.
Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me, but I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheelchair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically, it will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guy says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"
I would tell you a good joke, but I can’t, so here is a bad one.
I would tell you a joke about a teacher, but she’d kill you at school.
This is a joke to tell to someone with you or something. SOMEONE will laugh. Say: "This word isn't gonna be funny until I tell you, your probably not going to laugh." *your friend* "what's the word?" *you* "finger" *friend* *dies of laughter*. *note* it works better if you wiggle your finger or something before and not everyone laughs, so don't feel bad if they don't. Also, don't be surprised if you get put in jail for murder, because you're going to kill someone with this.