Bad

Bad jokes

Orphan

    • An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.

    I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

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    • Sex

    • Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"

    Man: "Yes!"

    Reporter: "Name?"

    Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."

    Reporter: "Sex?"

    Man: "Three to five times a week."

    Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"

    Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."

    Reporter: "Holy cow!"

    Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."

    Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"

    Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."

    Reporter: "Oh dear!"

    Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."

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    • Bad memes

    Delivery

    • Every bad joke can become a good joke with a good delivery, but abortion jokes, they have no delivery.

    Birthday

    • There was this man, and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up, she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale.

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    • Toe

    • A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it.

    Doctor: "I have good news and bad news."

    Guy: "What's the bad news?"

    Doc: "They replaced your toe with a piece of candy."

    Guy: "Good news?"

    Doc: "You now have tic tac toe."

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    • Birth Certificate

    • A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.

    "Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.

    "Denise."

    "That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"

    "Tom Junior."

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    • Lord

    • After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park.

    Lord: "Has something happened while I was gone?"

    Gardener: "Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burying your dog."

    Lord: "My dog died?!"

    Gardener: "Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down."

    Lord: "My mansion?! How?!"

    Gardener: "Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains."

    Lord: "Why was she so distraught?"

    Gardener: "She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped."

    Lord: "My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?!"

    Gardener: "Oh right! Your cancer test results!"

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