Bad jokes
Why are uncles like curries?
Because bad ones hurt your asshole.
Where did Sally go when the bomb went off?
Everywhere.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
Why is an orphan bad at hide-and-seek?
Because nobody will actually look for them.
What’s the difference between toilet paper and a curtain?
So, it was you....
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree.
Too bad he left him hanging.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
Summer wasn't too bad either.
Roses are red. I love hot food. If I was a bad bitch, I'd wanna fuck me too.
Oh wait, I am.
I have fuck and sex with all the sexy naked ladies and they suck my balls (penis), but you ain't have no girlfriend. Your only friend, they call him ching chong coz of your hairline.
Oh no, I feel bad for Stephen Hawking. He can’t get up the stairway to Heaven.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
I'm so friking dumb, even I need Joe Mama so fricking bad.
What’s up with the foot feet?
What is the plural of "goose"? "Geese."
What is the plural of moose? Well, it ant meese.
Well, it’s my first joke. Please forgive me if it’s bad.
You know how bad of a person you are when you figure out how long you wait to smash. For me and my girlfriend, it was between the first plane crash and the last tower falling.
Why is it bad to high five an emo?
They will leave themselves hanging.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't have a home plate.
A man tried to attack me with milk and cheese—how dairy!
Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender asks what he wants. The man says, "I would like one beer for me and one for the road."
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.