Away jokes
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
At this point, I don't want a funeral when I commit. I just want a going away party so people have an excuse to celebrate.
Two natives sit in the bar getting shit-faced.
Almost closing time, "Brother, you gonna snag?"
"Yeah, I'm taking her home."
He walks over, she gathers her things. Walking out together, he takes her to his car outback. They stay messing around then start having sex. He starts to get carried away. He looks down at her. She looks up at him and says, "Slow down, cousin, you're going too fast..."
Health and safety tips: Looking at your hairline is hazardous. For your best interest, please look away.
Yo life so miserable, the adoption center wouldn't sell you, just give you away!
Me tryin to get away from a conversation with my best friend
Your hairline's so far back that Usain Bolt had to run 50 miles away from you!
Yo mama is so ugly that Kanye West went East to get away from her.
Yo mama is so ugly that her DoorDash driver took her order away.
The Hodja purchased a piece of meat at the market, and on his way home he met a friend.
Seeing the Hodja's purchase, the friend told him an excellent recipe for stew.
"I'll forget it for sure," said the Hodja. "Write it on a piece of paper for me."
The friend obliged him, and the Hodja continued on his way, the piece of meat in one hand and the recipe in the other. He had not walked far when suddenly a large hawk swooped down from the sky, snatched the meat, and flew away with it.
"It will do you no good!" shouted the Hodja after the disappearing hawk. "I still have the recipe!"
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
How? She could not run away.
Why did the homophobic boy get fired from the banana factory?
He kept throwing away the bent ones!
You know Mark once said, "Go away, Freddy, or I'll suck your dick!"
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
Why can orphans get away with robbing the bank?
Because no one wants him.
Q: Why did the chip run away?
A: His saucy friend tried to jizz on him.
Why did Elsa's dog run away?
Because she let it go!
You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
Why did Naruto run fast?
Because he tried to get away from himself.
Kobe never died, he just faded away.