I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie.
She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom jeans!
Best friend: Dude, your sister is hot, I'd hit that.
Me: Already did. SWEET HOME ALABAMA
How did the skeleton win the girl? He was humerus.
Why do you want me?
Cus u like me...
What do you mean?
You love me.
No.
Look down.
Why is the sun so attractive? Because it is burning hot!
Are you a volcano? Because you're hot and I really lava you!
What do you call a ride that drops 180 degrees?
Cold as hell.
Feel my shirt...it's boyfriend material.
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
Hey girl, are you a wizard? Because you cast lit in my Final Fantasy!
Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.
What did the dirt say to the embers?
You look smoking hot.
When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.
You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.
Kaden wants to have sex with you.
I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.
I carried a magnet, then people found me very attracting.
My friend had this annoying little kid that always used to yell and scream when he didn't get what he wanted. I told my friend there's a new attraction a few states away he could take him to.
Confused, my friend asked me what it was. I told him, "The Sandy Hook Experience: Where you come in and leave with a 'hole' lot of fun."
