What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
Hairy vagina is like sweets with the wrapper on. You don't like it, but you still eat it.
I wank over Rose Watson.
What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy children.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
I think my coworkers are gay. -- Every time I walk by, they mumble, "What an ass."
I was sitting next to this really hot Thai girl on the bus, and all I could think to myself was, "Don't get an erection, don't get an erection..." But she did.
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
