Ate jokes
Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sourpuss.
Yo momma is so hungry that she ate your peanuts!
Why can’t Asian people play baseball?
Why?
'Cause they ate the bat!
Q: What do you call brown mixed with yellow?
A: Someone who just ate beans.
Laila has 69 boobs, but that is 222 too many. One day, she went on 51st Street to meet Dr. X, who ate all her boobs, and now she's boobless :)
6922251 x 8 = 55378008. Put the calculator upside down.
A woman comes from a restaurant and ate a lot of beans.
When she gets home, her husband puts a blindfold on her and says not to take it off. The lady hears her husband leave the room and starts farting really loudly. When the husband comes back and takes off the blindfold, the lady sees 12 people with pegs on their noses singing happy birthday!
A guy ate your hairline because it reminded him of a McDonald's fry!
Q: Why is China so bad at baseball?
A: They already ate the bat.
After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.
I was wearing a mask and told the teacher I ate her vagina. She said what? I pulled my mask down and said, "No, I said I like your hyenas." Then a kid sees me do it, but he only heard the first part, so he goes up to the teach and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight." She said, "Pull your mask down," and he pulls his mask down and says, "I'ma fuck you tonight."
Yo mama is SO FAT... SO FUCKING FAT... That when she went on the bus, she wasn't allowed in. She asked why, and the driver pointed to the sign "Weight capacity of 50 people". The bus was empty.
She got mad and ate the bus!
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
Today I ate out my girlfriend... Jeffrey Dahmer style.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
Ok ok ok so 7 ate 9, but why was 10 scared? Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Why was six scared of seven? Because 7 ate 9. Why was 10 scared? Because it was between 9/11.