Q: What do you call brown mixed with yellow?
A: Someone who just ate beans.
I ate all of your mommy's orphans.
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
Three guys landed on a cannibal island. The cannibal chef told them if they wanted to live, they had to go get 10 of one fruit and bring it to him, and he would tell them what to do.
So the first guy brings 10 apples, and the chef said if he could shove all 10 of those in his ass without making a sound, he could live. He was three apples in and made a sound, and they ate him. The second guy brought grapes; nine grapes in, and he burst out laughing. The cannibals ate him. Then the first guy said, "Why'd you laugh? You were almost there!" The other guy who had the grapes said, "I couldn't help it, I was told the third guy came back with 10 pineapples."
Why are Chinese people bad at baseball?
Because they ate the bases.
What's great about having sex with twenty-eight year olds?
There's ate of them.
What was Beethoven called when he only ate beef?
Beefthoven!
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
Why is 6 scared of 7? 7 8 9.
Seven ate nine.
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
Once, I ate a skunk. It was hard because I didn't get it down the whole way.
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.
How do trees find each other? They log-ate!
Jamal had 75 candy bars. He ate 65. What does he have now?
Diabetes.
The 🦅 asked the female eagle, "What did you eat?"
"I ate New York hot dogs."
After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.
I'm black, and I have a dying family in my basement that hasn't eaten in 2 weeks. They need help.
Btw, it's a joke lol.
I told my doctor I ate a bunch of bananas. It wasn’t a very a-peeling experience.
Why is 6 afraid of 7? Cause 7 ate 9!
Why is 7 afraid of 8?
Because 8 ate 9, 10, 11!
