Astronomy jokes
The earth is not round.
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Everyone: What does NASA mean?
NASA's response: National Aeronautics and Space Administration.
Everyone: What does NASA mean?
Arinator's response: National Ariana and Space Ariana.
Uranus is blue.
Uranus is a gassy planet.
Hubble just spotted something huge coming out of Uranus.
Gay person to girl: What’s your favorite planet?
Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?
Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!😅
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
He just needed a little space.
Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
Have you eaten at the restaurant on the Moon? It's got good food, but no atmosphere.
I like Uranus.
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus:] Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid. And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder. You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older. But the meteor men beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture.
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin. The water's getting warm so you might as well swim. My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.
[Chorus 2x]
Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas. I need to get myself away from this place. I said yep, what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see. So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus]
And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
So big that when you step, you break the whole galaxy.
Why is Uranus like paper? Because you do see the other side.
Why did the cow go to space? To go to the moon!
What did Earth say to the other planets?
"You guys have no life!"
How do stars die?
Normally, an overdose.
NASA called me and they said they reached your hairline.
"Yo mama so fat, she thought Saturn was deez nuts."
Why doesn’t the sun ☀️ go to college?
Because it has a million degrees.