Ares jokes
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your mom gay, And so are you.
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
Why are eggs bad at puns?
They always mix up their yolks!
In India, 3 things are wide and far everywhere, but no one admits: racism, sexism, and Sunny's jism.
Are you a border? 'Cause I can't get over you.
If you're bored, just punch an orphan!
What are they gonna do...tell their parents?
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day:
Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you're told.
Did you know emo kids are the highest jumpers in the world? Some are still up there!
What’s the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, “No honey for you for one month!”
Later that afternoon, Johnny’s dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. “That’s it! No butter for you for one month!” says his dad.
Later that evening as Johnny’s mother cooks dinner, a cockroach runs across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, “Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?”
Cow jokes are udder-culous (ridiculous)!
Like if you are a simp.
9/11 jokes aren't funny. They are just plane wrong.
These jokes are all crap.
I saw a kid crying yesterday, and I asked him, "Where are your parents?" Then he started crying harder.
Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"
Why do they act so emo?
Because they are all retards.
Why are priests so bad at racing? They are always in the 'little behind'.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 10 fingers, the middle ones are for you.