Ares jokes

Bitch

You want to know what annoying people and dogs have in common.

The female ones are called "bitch."

Girl

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Girls are like bacteria. The toxic ones are everywhere, and you have to take special care of the good ones.

Outlaw

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What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws?

Outlaws are wanted :)

Milk

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Little Johnny: Hey, Dad, are you finally back with the milk?

Dad: Yea, but it's expired, so I'm going back to the "milk store" and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)

Child

How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?

Depends on who's hanging.

9/11

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My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"

Sex

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Day 70 without sex, my doctor asked me, "Are you sexually active?" I said, "Why, what you tryna do?"

Penguin

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A man runs into a church and shouts, "Are there any dwarf nuns in the monastery?" The Pope said no, causing the man to say to his friend, "I told you you fucked a penguin!"