Me: spreading positivity.
Everyone else at the HIV testing center.
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
The thing I don't like about shopping centers...
When you see one, you've seen a mall.
Most people say I'm a clown. Yet they don't laugh at my jokes. Most people avoid me because I'm a "clown". Yet I'm not the center of the circus. But I know I'm gonna be a clown forever. Because I can't take this damn mask off, no matter how hard I try.
Weeks later: Finally I found out why I'm being called a clown...because my smiling face is fake...
On a scale of Johnny Depp having an erectile dysfunction to Michael Jackson exposing himself in a child day care center, how hard is it to get into Oxford?
An old lady walks into an adoption center, and the lady that runs the business says, "Oh, haven’t seen you in a long time!"
The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the World Trade Center.
What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?
“Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”
Why was the tower of Pisa leaning?
They had better reflexes than the trading center.
"Hello, this is your captain speaking. We are flying at a level of 89 feet. If you look out of your window on the left, you will see the World Trade Center."
I just finished my fourth round of baby back ribs. For some reason, everyone else at the abortion center is staring at me.
I was just chilling in the World Trade Center and got airplane wifi.
You're so ugly that even the World Trade Center got a better transformation than you.