Appearance jokes
Arden is so fat!
Your mama is so ugly, she makes the devil cry.
Yo mama so ugly that when Hello Kitty saw her, she said, "Goodbye!"
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
What did one needle say to the other?
"You be looking sharp!"
Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died?
To be honest, she was on the whole dashboard too.
Mom: That's why your dad left you.
Me: Why?
Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.
Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!
Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!
(This actually did happen in real life.)
My friend: "Hey, I see a dwarf!"
Me: "Where?"
Friend: "In front of me."
Stranger: Do you need hair regrowth products?
Kid: No, my hairline is just far back.
Stranger: Do you need a doctor?
It would be a miracle if someone figured out the length of your hairline.
Why can I be black? Because I look like I have puberty, and I sound like I had puberty.
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
I am a fat girl.
Your forehead is so big that you dream in 4K.
You're so ugly not even your mom thinks you're beautiful.
Your hairline and my grandpa go way back.
Sydney Drake is hot. ⛓🖤🥺😩
Yo mama's so ugly, she could make an onion cry.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!
Hey, you have something on your chin, no the 3rd one down.