Appearance jokes
You're so skinny that your mom had to use a whole shampoo bottle on your head, but she still couldn’t find you.
Even your mother can never fix your hairline, just God.
Kenneth's hairline [is] friends with Moses.
Your hairline is so long that sometimes even the president doesn't know where it ends.
Normal people have a four-head, but bro... you got a fourteen-head.
You're so ugly Bob the Builder cat can fix you.
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
You're so ugly, your mother thought about setting you up for adoption.
If you looked in the mirror, you would see an ugly person, which is you.
Yo mama is so ugly that even Donald Trump couldn't be inside her dreams.
Coworker, why is Sara so blue?
Is it because Sara wishes she had a man? coworker she always watches you with your husband together out of love. You better watch out dear, she might "saraorize" him, with her crooked teeth and ultra-thin lips.
Bully: Your fat.
Me: Fat is something to fix, but your face isn't.
I used to know a guy from a nudist colony.
Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on him!
Yo mama so fat, she's the reason why Slenderman has no eyes.
Yo mama is so ugly, even the ugliest person in the world looked like a sword standing next to her.
You're so skinny, if someone farts in your direction, you will fly away.
My wiener's small.
You're do annoying like your fucked up hairline.
A German priest went to America for a few months. Unfortunately for him, he did not speak the best English. He stayed with a beautiful, young single woman who worked at a nearby orphanage.
Every day, he visited her in the orphanage, and he always brought her small gifts, and of course to the young children.
The young woman thought the priest was flirting with him, and she knew he was not married. She left that thought in the back of her mind for a few weeks.
A few weeks later, she finally brought up her nerve to ask him. She asked him why he always visited her, and why all the gifts for her and the children.
Of course, due to his bad English, he struggled a bit with his sentence, but he said in his thick German accent, "Vell, I visit you and your, your littles, because the kind girls here are very beautiful and cute."
She was quite amused, and blushed a bit. The man was also a bit nervous, and appeared to want to leave her office.
The Priest then excused himself, and went to read the orphans a bedtime story.
He then muttered to himself, "Ach, she's catching on to me! Stupid! Zey are called little girls and boys, not child boys and girls."
Wanna hear a joke?
Your outfit. Har har!