Appearance jokes

I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.

She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.

Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!

"Orla Doyle is fit."

Yo mama so fricking ugly, she made humans to extinct.

People wonder why our generation grew up so sarcastic.

"Hey, how do I look?"

"With your eyes, Joe."

Yo mama so hairy that when she go to the hair salon they say, "No pets allowed."

You're so damn ugly that the robbers only go into your house to close the blinds.

Roses are red, violets are blue, she is hot, but you're as ugly as poo.

Donald Trump is, like, really orange.

What do you call a person with no eyebrows?

Ms. Burgos.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

Yo' mama is so ugly, she makes onions cry.

I have the funniest joke ever, here it is...

Your face!

Yo mama so fat, she's the reason why Slenderman has no eyes.

If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.

Ur fat.

Your fat!

All dumbs aren't blonde.

Yo mama so ugly that on Halloween she didn't get candy.

Y'all is ugly!

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.