Answer jokes
A penguin walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So what will it be this time?" The penguin doesn't answer because it's a penguin.
What is a type of cancer that:
Affects you. Is caused by a device. Is annoying. People won't stop talking about it?
Easy, the answer is Fortnite.
Why did the kid go in the guy's van?
Answer: He thought he was being adopted.
Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?
Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.
Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?
Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.
How much do pirate earrings cost? 🤔
Answer: A buck an ear. 🤣
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.
Still waiting on an answer.
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
Why did 6 eat 7? Because 7 ate 9.
My girlfriend asked, "Why is this test so long and hard?"
I then said, "You know what else is long and hard..."
She was amazed!
Where does a cow take his date?
Answer: To the moooooovies!
What is it called when an orphan goes on vacation?
Answer: He's making family memories.
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...
Did you ever walk into Stephen Hawking's house?
Answer: No, neither did he.
I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.
I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.
What does a "Smart Russian" and a "Unicorn" have in common?
Answer: Non-existence!