ANS jokes
What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?
A family portrait/A selfie.
What's the difference between an egg and a good wank?
You can beat an egg.
I've got an impressive record at Russian roulette. Retired after one loss ever.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.
What do you call an accomplished opera singer with recurring gonorrhea?
Standing ovation!
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
What is a selfie of an orphan called?
A family photo.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then half of the least dose would be a lifetime supply.
An acronym for penis is Proton-enhanced nuclear induction spectroscopy. So just remember, the word "nuclear" is part of a penis.
What do you call an octopus on land?
A spider, duh!
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
I thought about going on an all-almond diet.
But that’s just nuts.
I'll give you an A because you're awesome.
B because you're beautiful.
A C because you're caring.
And I'll give you this D cuz you deserve it.
An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.
He called them: “ASPERGER’S”
What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?
A crab apple!
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
What do you do when an orphan is taking a photo?
Yell "FAMILY PICTURES!"
What do you call an orphan in Alabama?
A virgin.
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!