ANS jokes
Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.
What’s the difference between being a genius and being an idiot?
Being a genius has its limits.
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, and swim is already in America.
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.
What's the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?
Not too sure. I just fly the drone.
HOWWW
What do an orphan's parents and Nemo have in common?
They both can't be found.
If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.
What happens when you throw an underage boy between two Catholic priests?
They fight and... You know the rest.
if you ask an artist how to commit suicide, they will say a very creative way
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap until their parents come home.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What movie does an orphan hate?
"Spider-Man: Far From Home."
A group of Astronauts, a Mechanic, a Pilot, & a Communications operator are on a very important mission to Mars when one of their solar panels gets grazed by a meteorite.
And so the Astronauts quickly assemble in the hull to wait for orders from the ground. Once the Communications operator turned on coms, their man on the ground told the Pilot to continue their course & to send the Mechanic out to fix the problem. As the Mechanic worked on finishing repairing the solar panel, the Pilot & Communications operator told each other dark jokes when out of nowhere a meteorite field appeared! The Ground operator frighteningly shouted "Get him back in the ship!" to the Communications operator. "Chill out, he'll be fine," The Pilot assured him. "Get him the hell out of there, that's an order!" The Ground operator argued. Then thirty seconds later the Communications operator came back from the air shoot & asked, "Now what?"
Yo forehead so big, an airplane can use that as a runway!
In my locality, there was an orphanage but everybody in the locality was really sexist too, so they had to change the orphanage into a brothel 'cause everybody took the boys away and nobody was taking the girls and the manager didn't want to waste any 14-year-old pussy, did he?
What's the difference between an orphan and a flower?
The flowers actually get picked.
Three scientists are doing an experiment. They are trying to find out what happens when you stick a cork in an elephant's ass.
In the lab, they each look at each other and decide that they should hire a monkey to do it. The monkey sticks the cork up the elephant's ass, and the scientists wait three weeks.
The monkey pulls out the cork, and all three scientists go back and discuss what they saw.
The first one, standing one mile away, says all he could see was a wave of brown, then it all went black. The second, standing two miles away, said the same. The third, who was standing three miles away, said all he could see was the other two get consumed by a massive cloud of brown.
Why can't an orphan go to school? He needs a parent admission form to get in.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because he can’t find home.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.