ANS jokes
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
I saw a kid crying, so I asked them where their parents were.
God, I love working at an orphanage!
When I become a parent, I’m gonna regurgitate my food to feed my children.
It’ll give me an excuse to make out with my daughter.
If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What do you call an orphan's family picture?
A selfie.
Memes
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked.
I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.
They said: "Because I lost my parents."
I said: "Let's find them."
They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.
What do you call an engineer that bakes? A BAKENEER!
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
A leaf and an emo fall from a tree. Which hits the ground first?
The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
One day I walk up to an emo kid. I realized he had a fresh cut, so I grab my hand and slap his wrist and told him, "I like ya cut, G!"
I remember the time that Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... it was a short episode. Too bad he couldn’t find any.
Child: Mom, someone told me you talk like an owl.
Teacher: Who?
Child: Oh, it is true, you do talk like an owl!
What do you call an orphanage that's not an orphanage?
A homeless shelter.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Stephen Hawking isn't actually dead. He is just having an update.
If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.