Animal jokes
I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks!
What is a cow's favorite drink?
Mountain Moo!
What do cats eat for breakfast?
"Mice Krispies!"
What time do you have when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
charging power
If hay is for horses, what is for unicorns?
Haaaaaaay!
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
JAW don't know sh*t!
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
I once tried to have a family friendly conversation with a worm, but it kept its head in the dirt.
What do you cross with a cow and a tiger? (mooigter)
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
Why was the elephant woozy?
Because he was trunk.
Whet
Why can’t Helen Keller jump out of an airplane?
It scares the shit out of her dog.
I'm a cheetah, I cheat, duh?
My grandfather has the heart of a lion... and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Why can't we see a camel?
Because it's camelflauged!