Once I had a cat. The cat liked human beverages.
One day I decided to throw a party. The cat went over to get some soda. There was a line. I told him that he needed to wait in line. The line was too long for the cat. Then he walked to the punch bowl. He saw that there was no punch line. Very much like this joke.
Black dog is gay.
Mary had a little lamb.
Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!
In a world of feline folly, There lived a cat with a secret, A taste for adventure and mischief, And a love for KFC's golden treat.
With eyes like emerald jewels, And fur as black as night, This feline prowled the streets, In search of a savory delight.
Oh, how it yearned for chicken, Crispy and finger-lickin' good, But the cat knew it had to be sly, To satisfy its craving like it should.
Through alleyways it stealthily tiptoed, With nimble paws and a stealthy glide, Until it stumbled upon a secret, That made its hunger amplified.
A stash of KFC's golden eggs, Hidden away from prying eyes, An accidental treasure trove, A feast fit for a feline paradise.
With each stolen egg devoured, The cat's satisfaction grew, The taste of crispy breading, And juicy chicken, it knew.
Word soon spread of this food bandit, A legend of a cat so bold, Whispers echoed through the town, Of the one who stole the KFC gold.
But the cat with the KFC get eggs, Remained a mystery to all, A phantom of the night it became, Leaving no trace, no trail to recall.
And so, it continues its nightly quest, For chicken that satisfies its soul, The cat with the KFC get eggs, Forever on the prowl, never to be controlled.
Are you a bull, because I wanna ride you like a rodeo.
Why do you stink?
Because you haven't showered, tu, perro.
Why did the pig decline to go to the farmer's house?
He would take him to a "pignic."
Why did the ass start a gardening service?
It was great at dropping SEEDS.
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
What is the sexiest animal alive? The Βυττerfly.
What do you call an animal in space? Just death because you need a spacesuit.
What’s the difference between a chicken and an orphan?
The chicken is actually used for something.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
El, if I know.
Where do spiders seek health advice? WebMD.
Why can’t fish play basketball?
'Cause they are scared of the net.
POV: A person made you mad, but you're Chinese and they have a cat. "CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, BITCH."
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
Why did the duck walk across the road? I lost my pecker!
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
