Q : What's the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A : I can jump on my bed. A : And I use a pillow on both of them.
I once had a pet snake, exactly 3.14 meters. He was a great πthon.
What do you call an owl with armor?
A Knight Owl!
Why was the turtle 🐢 looking at her phone?
She wanted to take a shellfie.
The thing about animals is every time you pick one up, you have to put it down.
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cook out?
A jump rope!
Doc: can I help u? Girl: doctor I have pain in my heart? Doc: when did it begin? Girl: right now ( seeing hem like doll ). Doc: hh..do you like me? I know I am handsome... Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. U just look like someone I know. Doc: Who is that? Is ur boyfriend? Girl: No, it’s my pet ( rabbit) his name is Rokie.
How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.
Why does the owl 🦉 have a lot of friends?
Because he’s a hoot.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay man's house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
moo
What do you call a white duck?
A quacker.
what did the cow say to the fat pig? moooooooove over
me and my friend roasting each other, friend: you look like a baboon, me: stop talkin you look likea gorilla so i might call animal control on you and ill be seeing you at the zoo!
When a cat gets a sibling do they say Oh shit another mew kid?!?!?!?!
Tigger was playing hide & seek so he looked in the toilet but all he found was pooh
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd? A hipster!
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.
Why did the dog join the marching band?
Because he had his trum-bone.
I would slap you but that would be animal abuse (▼へ▼メ) (▼へ▼メ) (▼へ▼メ) (▼へ▼メ)
