Me: Doctor can I get new butt? My old one has a crack in it. Doctor: I told you a billion times already. Everyone's butt has a crack in it. Me: How do you know that?
i always say no to drugs but considering that im talking to them rn i probably already said yes
At 5 years, i already knew how to throw paper airplanes thanks to my Arabian relatives!
I was playing basket ball and a guy in a wheelchair asked if he could play.
I looked at him and told him that we are looking for ankle breakers yours are already broken.
Any want didn’t they said they and slice a everyone offered already you because free guilt pizza entire the eat to you allows enjoy people many not that toppings with pizza a to liking a taking
Why are Americans badar clash Royale
Because they have already lost 2 towers
Why are New Yorkers so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
Watersharky Music Productions Presents Memories by Conan Gray One, two It's been a couple months That's just about enough time For me to stop crying when I look at all the pictures Now I kinda smile, I haven't felt that in a while It's late, I hear the door Bell ringing and it's pouring I open up that door, see your brown eyes at the entrance You just wanna talk and I can't turn away a wet dog But please don't ruin this for me Please don't make it harder than it already is I'm trying to get over this I wish that you would stay in my memories But you show up today, just to ruin things I wanna put you in the past 'cause I'm traumatized But you're not letting me do that, 'cause tonight You're all drunk in my kitchen, curled in the fetal position Too busy playing the victim to be listening to me when I say "I wish that you would stay in my memories" In my memories, stay in my memories Now I can't say goodbye if you stay here the whole night You see, it's hard to find an end to something that you keep beginning Over and over again I promise that the ending always stays the same So there's no good reason in make believing that we could ever exist again I can't be your friend, can't be your lover Can't be the reason we hold back each other from falling in love With somebody other than me I wish that you would stay in my memories But you show up today, just to ruin things I wanna put you in the past 'cause I'm traumatized But you're not letting me do that, 'cause tonight You're all drunk in my kitchen, curled in the fetal position Too busy playing the victim to be listening to me when I say "I wish that you would stay in my memories" In my memories, stay in my memories Since you came I guess I'll let you stay For as long as it takes To grab your books and your coat And that one good cologne That you bought when we were fighting 'Cause it's still on my clothes, everything that I own And it makes me feel like dying I was barely just surviving I wish that you would stay in my memories But you show up today, just to ruin things I wanna put you in the past 'cause I'm traumatized But you're not letting me do that, 'cause tonight You're all drunk in my kitchen, curled in the fetal position Too busy playing the victim to be listening to me when I say "I wish that you would stay in my memories" In my memories, stay in my memories
I would roast you but you're already so hot.
I said to my girlfriend nothing can ever make you look ugly...
Because you already look ugly.
Me: Can I get your mom's number?
Friend: Here you go:
Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.
Why is black mystery not an airhead flavor? Because we already know what happened to them *shot fires*
Depression: here your mom just died. Me: MY MOM IS ALREADY DEAD
Hey guys. I just wanted to say, while I think some rape jokes can be funny, not one of these are. In fact, I find them pretty horrifying.
I was raped when I was fourteen (about six years ago), and I have made one rape joke in my entire life when, last year, I said "I don't fuck with rapists, I just get fucked by them." I thought it was funny. No one else did, and they were probably right in that.
My point is this: rape jokes CAN be funny when they are used by victims as a way of coping with trauma. They CANNOT be funny when they are made about raping someone else. Even if there is a difference between joking about raping someone and raping someone, it is absolutely disgusting to think such a horrific crime is funny, and I am sure at least some of the posters on this page have already crossed the line into committing rape.
Great material for social scientific research, though, gentlemen. Really well done.
a kid was asking a mother for money
mother: sorry I don't have money
the kid kept asking the mother for money
mother: I already told you I don't have money
the kid(the middle child): I'm your fucking child
Hello my fellow americans Im playing clash royal for the USA clan and 2 tower are already gone?
Me - why u need to use shampoo when ur already bald🤣
My bff asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?" I said: "Why?" My bff says: "Well its because he was already cheating." I said: "KNEW IT!"
Who needs April 1st if your whole life is already a lie?
