Aed jokes
A rooster ran across the border from the USA to Canada and laid an egg. Which country does that egg belong to? Roosters don't lay eggs.
What's a perfect example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding only half a worm.
That was a really crappy bun!
What's the difference between a plane and a woman?
At least the plane doesn't give you herpes when it crashes at your place.
I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and when I’m bored, I draw on my hands with a pen. Well, this guy walks up to me and says, “You know, I got mental illnesses from drawing on myself.”
And so, without thinking, I said, “Well, I’ve already got those, so I think I’m fine...” 😳 He looked concerned. Oops lol.
Yo mama slept with so many guys she's starting to look like one.
An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called "Lenin in Poland." When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests.
The painting depicts Lenin's wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky.
"But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?" asks one of the guests.
"Lenin is in Poland," replies the painter.
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
Where do leg amputees go to buy a car? IHOP
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
One day, two Chinese people with broken English go to America. When they arrive, they go to a small place to eat. When they look at the menu, they see "hot dog," but since their English is bad, they think it's literally a roasted dog and order it. When it comes back, they're both surprised, and one of them asks,
"What part of the dog did you get?"
Me: "Hey, you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong."
Trashy pig woman: "Why?"
Because you smell like fart, and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.
Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."
Me: "You should be Batman."
Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One to trust and the other to thrust.
You're a fat poop poop!
Why don't catholic kids lose their virginity in their 20's?
Because they lost it to a priest when they were 5
Yo mama so fat that the US (Mexico) and North Korea (South Korea) got into a war fighting over who gets to use her as their border wall.
How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill?
She was too used to grabbing the tip.