Aed jokes
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
What did MLK Jr. say when he spent the night on the internet?
"Last night I had a meme."
What do you call a rabbit with a big ass?
A BUNny.
What is a girl's favorite song when they are on their period?
"Period, oh period, oww!"
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.
That made my father very mad, as we didn’t have a fireplace.
Maybe you should go on eBay to see if they have a life for sale.
One day, a man visited an orphanage.
Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"
The kid cries even harder.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
Why is football the gayest sport ever? Because it's just a bunch of sweaty men tackling each other.
Lewandowski is so fast because whoever would think of adding an engine to him is a genius!
A goose with no beak, and you eat?
Goose beak salad, file! :)
What do you call a hamburger that can talk and walk?
Funny weird walkie hamburger and talkie cute hamburger. Lol.
Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.
His parents weren't too happy.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
I've got a job defusing landmines.
It's difficult, but hopefully soon I'll find my feet.
"If two sides in a battlefield read my book, there will be no winner."
Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"A foolish man is lactose intolerant. A wise man simply tolerates it."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.
Why did Jesus die at the diving Olympics? Because he can't go through water.