Aed jokes
How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
Neither has he.
Everybody was kung flu dying.
It traveled as fast as lightning.
2020 was expert timing.
In fact, it was a little bit frightening.
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
What is a ghost's favorite cake?
I scream cake!
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
Q: How can you tell if a vampire is sick?
A: By how much he's coffin.
What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?
Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.
It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.
Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."
"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
Why can't a steam locomotive sit down?
Because it has a tender behind.
"Hotel Rwanda" has a high score on Rotten Tomatoes, but their Yelp reviews are terrible.
I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a waste of time.
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
A scarecrow said this job isn't for everyone.
But hay! It's in my jeans!