Aed jokes

Me: "WYD?"

Her: "Just dealing with a lot: depression, anxiety, and the feeling that I'll never be enough."

Me: "Without me? Lol"

I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!

I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.

How does a non-binary ninja slay enemies?

They/Them.

Never talk about 9/11 to me. I lost my dad in it.

He was a great pilot ;(

Jesse: Do you like my ball?

Mike: Yes, they are very big. I can’t even fit them in my mouth. You bought a new ball, right?

Jesse: No, they do not leave me.

They made a movie about 9/11.

It was a big hit.

How does a disabled person play chess?

I think you forgot they don't have legs.

There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.

I tried a lemonade from my friend. It tasted fantatastic!

Guys, don’t suck your own dick, it does not feel like your dick is being sucked, it feels like you're sucking a dick.

What do you call 2 wings and a halo?

A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪

What’s the difference between a chicken and an orphan?

The chicken is actually used for something.

Wesley, stop saying your life is a joke.

Jokes have meaning.

I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.

It showed a picture of myself.

You're a copycat from Ballarat You smell like a rat, you wear a hat and you are shaped like a baseball bat.

Song by John Rizk

I wrote a song about a tortilla yesterday, but it’s actually more of a rap.

"Brian, can I see that paper for a sec?"

What do you call a horde of Autistic kids?

A zombie Apocalypse!

Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhh🧟

Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.

He really shook things up today.